Posted by: nikicf | March 31, 2010

Loss of Logic

There is something about the scale that gives me bad logic.   This is not new news to me, but lately I’ve been facing the fact that when it comes to my weight, I can’t seem to think logically.

Pretty sure I’m not the only one, but this is usually how it goes for me.

Each morning, I tell myself I’m not going to stand on the scale.  I know once or twice a week is enough, and I am already set to weigh in Fridays (for BLAH) and Saturdays (for Weight Watchers). Skip that step in your morning routine, Niki.

But then I, somehow, end up on the scale.  Looking for some good news after a “good” day.  (Or hoping for no bad news after a “bad” day.)  And convincing myself it won’t affect my mood or the tone for the day.  But it does. (Even though I know it shouldn’t.)

If the number is up (and even by just a pound), I’m annoyed.  Disappointed. Frustrated.  And I want to eat.  I don’t want to be good and make healthy moderate choices.  I don’t want to work hard to get loads of veggies in and drink my glasses of water.  Instead, I want to snack.  I want to chow down.  I want to bake something. And eat it up all by myself! :S

It is like my logical brain goes to mush.  Niki, do you think you’ll feel better tomorrow if you over-eat today? And do you think the scale will head the right direction if you have a moderation melt-down and consume a boatload of calories?

I’m still trying to work all this out I guess.  Just yesterday, I had a day to prove how distorted my thinking is.  😦

And today I’m working to learn from my mistakes.  I’m trying not to beat myself up over letting myself get out of control.  To not be too discouraged, but to realize that this is all part of the process for me.  To focus on my success instead of my failures.

But I also want to look at what happens (happened) and try to learn from it, so I can change how I act and react in the future.  What set me off?  Why did eating way more than I wanted seem appealing or appear to be the answer?

And how can I do it differently in the future?  I remember thinking, as I chose another unhealthy snack, that I should call a friend instead.  Yes, the voice inside my head (my conscience?  God?) actually told me to do this, but I just kept going with what I was doing.  How can I change the outcome next time this threatens to happen.

And should I consider giving up the scale?  Is this what set me off, and maybe it is not worth knowing?  I have a friend who lost a lot of weight with Weight Watchers.  She stopped going to meetings after awhile as she realized she was obsessed with the scale and that it was not healthy for her.  Right now I don’t want to do this, as I like attending the meetings and having that accountability.   Plus feel like I worked so hard to have the benefits of being a lifetime member that I don’t want to give that up.

So… how can I learn to live peacefully with my scale?  And how can I learn not to let it be the complete measure of my success at this healthy lifestyle?  My goodness, I ran a half marathon!  I’ve come so far and need to be reminded of that when the scale gives me a number I don’t like the look of.

Hope I haven’t scared you all off with my ramblings.  I’ve decided to be transparent and use this space to be open and honest with my struggles, even if it does make me look like a bit of a nut-job.  😉  I’d love to have it all together and be *perfect* (so to speak), but that isn’t the case unfortunately.  I hope I’m helping somebody by letting it all hang out.  Even if it is just me!

(The above pictures were of the Cake Balls and Cake Pops my daughter and I made on a “date” afternoon.  Probably don’t even have to explain why I chose to include their picture in this post. 😛 )

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Check out the Raw Natural Mineral giveaway at An Apple A Day!  Ooooh, I wanna win!!  😀

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Responses

  1. yes, the scale struggle! i tried weighing in only once a week and found out i hated not knowing where i was every day, to MOTIVATE me to eat better (so maybe the opposite problem? I don’t know). anyway, my suggestion would be to have andy in control of the scale and hide it somewhere from you and bring it out on the mornings you need to weigh in.

    oh, those cake balls and cake pops look AMAZING. i want one!!! (or two or more…)

  2. First off, pretty fantastic cake pops!

    And then there’s the scale. I’m pretty sure I say “I totally know” to every post you write, but I’m saying it again. I am a daily weigher. I’ve read in different weight loss mags that daily weights are a common link between people that maintain longterm weight loss. Great. BUT, it affects my day….. 1/2 to 1 pound up even or 3 weeks with no loss ( I have ONE pound left)…and I’m irritated and feel like throwing in the towel.
    I haven’t solved this issue completely, but the biggest thing that has helped me is focusing on my blessings when I hit that mindset…my kids, my hubby, my home, My Lord that will one day take me to heaven and that pound will be SO nothing. Not saying that health and weight aren’t important, just saying it’s the easiest way for me to put it in perspective; Doesn’t always work, but often does.

    • Thanks for the compliment on the cake pops. The cake balls worked MUCH better for us, as I had a hard time keeping them on the sticks. Maybe my consistency was not quite right? I WILL be trying these again though, as Makenna wants them on top of her cake for her birthday party next Monday.

      Weird how the scale works differently for you. I’ve decided that for me once a week is enough (for the BLAH comp.) and twice the weeks I weigh in at Weight Watchers (has to be at least once a month). And NO MORE! Focus on the healthy is my goal, NOT the (silly) number!

    • It is definitely all about perspective, Meg. You are right about that. I just have trouble getting the proper one sometimes. Working on that with God and who I am in Him as my focus.

      Thanks for your comments, my friend. I appreciate them and your understanding of this struggle of mine!

  3. my weight goes up and down so much that I don’t really give too much thought to it. Yes, a decrease is always nice. But when the increases get so discouraging, I don’t think it’s worth it. I agree that it shouldn’t be the ultimate guide for the healthy choices you (we 😉 are making. You freaking did run a half-marathon. More than once! The old you could never have dreamed of that. You did it. And you inspired me to get off my butt. I’m still shooting for the 5K run and it’s actually in sight. There’s always a new day to make better choices. I appreciate your honesty.


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